Welcome to the Prophets of Zerzha

We're a group of highly trained, moderately employed, and slightly delusional seers who have dedicated our lives to predicting the future. Or not.

Our prophets are experts in the art of staring deeply into crystal balls, burning incense, and eating questionable meat from the local bazaar.

Learn more about our prophetic services, See what our clients say about us, or Read about our frequent misfortunes

Prophetic Predictions:

"The cat will eat the fish in 2023." "The rain will fall on Tuesdays, but not on Thursdays." "The world will end in 5 minutes. Or maybe it already has."

Remember, our predictions are 99% accurate. The other 1% is just for show.